Strict parenting

I have been called a "strict" mother. I don't let my kids back talk, or be rude, or throw a tantrum. Their are rules and they know them. The also know if they don't follow rules, there are consequences. Some people have told me that time-outs are to harsh and you should let your children decide and have choices. I agree with that, but if I ask Thaddeus if I can have his pacifier, I just gave him the options to tell me no. He could have it till he is 20 if I did that. I tell him, I need the sucker now. He used to tell me no, but that is a garbage word in our house and if I am told no, I give them a chance to change their answer and if not, they go to the corner till they tell me yes. I am never mean, I just explain that if I ask you to throw your diaper away, or give me your sucker (aka pacifier), or pick up your toys, I do not want to be told no. I never waver and they know that and it happens once and then they know fighting is pointless. I don't want to sound like all I do is follow them around and punish them. I play and play and play all day! I run and chase and tickle and laugh all day long. When I discipline, I never raise my voice, but it isn't my normal voice either, but it is never mean or scary. Just a voice to let them know I am for real. If they ask me to help, or play or whatever it may be, I do it. It goes both ways. I do count to 3 a lot, but not the normal counting to 3. I ask them to do something and if I don't get a movement or response I ask them to make the right choice and I will give them to 3 to make it or I will make the choice. I guess all my rules can sound harsh, but if you are in my house everyday, you would know that I am not mean about them, but I am constant and loving. I am best friends with my kids and I get hugs and kisses and cuddles all day long from all 3. My kids love me and most kids want discipline, need it, crave it. I am trying to mold and shape beautiful, loving, caring, wonderful people of future society! If someone has a problem with that, then sue me.
I have a great attorney!

2 comments:

Grammy of 9 said...

I love what you've said. No one likes to have little apes around, a child can be fun-loving and active and still be obedient and respectful. I worked hard for that with you kids, and I could take you anywhwere and not panic. You still loved me, right?

Natalie said...

I love you Nikki! You are a GREAT MOM, and there are three very lucky cute kids that get to have you as their mommy. You often say on your blog what I am feeling. It is nice to know there is someone out there who can relate to you.